Lessening Your Fears

I’m about to embark on a journey, and I hope you come along! Today, I want to help you with “lessening your fears.” That’s right “lessening,” not “take away all your fears” because some fear is good for us!

I have realized that “fear” is something we are taught as small children.
It plays a huge role in how we live our lives as adults. The first time we lose someone or something as a child, it will cause you the fear of losing anything else thereafter.

Some children go through dramatic events at very young ages. Typically, a child doesn’t know they have been affected until they are much older.

I, myself, have recognized how fear controls me today. I believe it is true – Fear and Pain go hand and hand! I fear I’ll never really be happy until I heal from the dramatic childhood I had. Understanding that has been my hardest step yet!

I also believe God wants to help me and YOU! Six months ago, I signed up to receive emails from a Christian paster from California, Havilah Cunnington. I found her on social media last summer and enjoyed her content, and most of all, her passion for wanting to help others. In those six months that I’ve received her emails, I never opened a single one for no other reason other than – I was just too busy. On January 6th, I opened my first email from Havilah Cunnington. Strangely enough, just an hour prior to opening Havilah’s email, I was writing in my journal about how I felt as a child. My feelings quickly brought me to tears. I wrote, “God, please help me heal my pain!

I believe God answered my prayer! 💜💜💜

This is how Havilah’s email went..

Hey Kathy,

As children, we experienced circumstances, completely out of our control that caused serious pain. We were naive to the harsh reality that this level of hurt even existed. Our suffering may not have been as severe as someone next to us, but it still played a pivotal role in forming our emotional foundation. Pain taught us to deal with hurt in whatever way necessary. Making every attempt possible to stop or suppress our pain, we still lacked the ability to fully control our environment.

Depending on how hurtful our childhood was, we developed deep patterns…ways to survive our pit of pain. The goal: survive until you become an adult. Getting older doesn’t guarantee we’re wiser. Going through HARD THINGS becomes a journey of survival. A motionless experience that is more familiar than free. We might say something like: “Getting the pain to stop as soon as possible is a matter of doing (just fill in the blank)!” It becomes a matter of technique. How quickly can we stop our pain without stopping the flow of our daily lives? “Doing whatever it takes” becomes our goal. Each of us attempt to keep the pain out of our now grown-up lives… or so we think.

The LIE: we can control the effects of our pain. We believe that pain, as long as it’s not influencing us now, will not hurt us. This is a myth! When a prisoner is set free from prison, it doesn’t mean he or she is set free from the issues that put them in prison. We attempt to avoid the harsh reality that we are still bound by pain.

Kathy, my prayer for you as you start this new year AND new decade, is that you discover the God who redeems and heals; the One who turns our mourning into dancing and restores all things. I recently released a new book called I Do Hard Things: Breaking Free of Fear and Pain and wanted to give you the first chapter.

Happy New Year! – Havilah

Now, I was beside myself! Knowing that God heard my cry out to him filled me with hope and faith! I believe Havilah’s book will become a tool to help (me) YOU break FREE from the Fear and Pain that is holding YOU back from living my happiest life!

Still today, I witness so many children going through trauma. That is where I find my strength in wanting to help them. Our youth needs our help more than our world can imagine! My prayer is that God will give me the tools to help more then just myself!


If you’d like to order Havilah’s book – I Do Hard Things, or you can follow along through audio lesson by clicking on the link below👇🏻

I’m excited to already have others that are eager to take this journey with me!

I hope you will join us as well!

Love Kathy ❤️


Socially Risky Goods

Some time ago a woman I know told me she bought her jeans from Walmart. This isn’t just an ordinary woman. This is a woman who always looks like a million bucks! Well when I was in Walmart this past fall, I stopped by the denim department to see what they had. Only because I really didn’t want to spend a lot of money on jeans while I am trying to lose weight.
To my surprise I saw a pair of jeans that I LOVE! Regular price was $17.98. I chuckled to myself while putting them in my cart never thinking these Walmart jeans would really work out for me. The next day I wore them to work and to my surprise…Almost all of my clients complimented me on my new WALMART Jeans!

I was happy to share where I bought them and how much I paid for them.
As a teenager and adolescent I would never think of buying clothes from Walmart, afraid of what others would think or make fun of me, but now I’m happy to say……
Life at 47 is so chill

Love Kathy  ❤

My Oldest Memory of New Years Eve

I was about eight or nine years old, my brother Bobby was just a year older then me. My Nana Kate asked if my brother and I would go and get her sardines to celebrate New Year’s Eve. My brother and I walked about 6 blocks to the closest store. After returning with her sardines she told us we could keep the change. We then walked back to the store to buy some candy so we could celebrate New Years too! I can remember sitting in a big burgundy chair facing the tv. My Nana Kate and I watched the ball drop on Tv. A young Dick Clark was hosting the show at the time.
The other tradition my Nana Kate did on New Years Eve, was to put dimes on her windowsills. She said it brought wealth and prosperity in the home throughout the year!
I have continued that tradition for many years now!
I was just 10 years old when she passed away. Her passing was my first heart break! I cherish the memories I have of her. My cousin Kathy just recently gave me a photo of our Nana Kate from when she was just a teenager. My husband Jon looked into the framing company. James Vent & Son’s Art Store on 34 N. Pearl St. in North Albany. It was established in 1885 and closed in 1914. I’m guessing the photo is close to the year 1911.
The photo of her instinctively reminded me of my son Jack. I saw it in her eyes! I’m assuming in the photo she was around the same age that Jack is now.

1114 Broadway North Albany

I love the Photograph! I have it displayed at Little Bella Studio.

I will cherish it forever!

I don’t think anyone could get me to eat sardines but running around before midnight on New Year’s Eve and putting dimes in all my windowsills, I hope will go on for years to come!

I hope this New Year is everything you need it to be!

I’m so excited on the vision I have for 2020!

Happy New Year Everyone!

Love Kathy ❤

Kindness this Holiday Season

I love how at this time of year people want to help others! What I love more is seeing kindness grow. It’s like they see the joy you get from helping others and just want to join in!

2012 Kindness Mission. That’s my son Jack, he’s the one with the black jacket on the left.

One year when my boys were in elementary school one of their friends mothers (Kelly Mateja) came up with a brilliant idea!

Morning of kindness mission!
I remember I was home sick and was unable to attend. But Kelly was kind enough to let Jack tag along with her! That was eight years ago!
I’m sure Kelly never imagined it would grow as big as it has! This will be it’s 8th year! Kelly said they now have over 1400 people signed up… 312 families/groups!

On kindness morning…..Everyone has a mission!
Everyone’s mission to spread kindness! To help others, and to be kind!
Kelly does not know this but I attached myself to that mission. Throughout the last seven years I have tried my best to help others! Jon and I have made that mission a strong value in our lives and house hold!

Reflecting today the kindness I have seen my boys have fills my heart!
I remember one year we did not sign up for kindness morning.
The kids were a little disappointed. Because everyone else was doing it but they were not!

So I went to my Facebook and looked at the first five people I thought that could use some holiday cheer and we brought them pretty little Christmas tree centerpieces and goodies to eat. The kids were so happy and we had so much fun doing it!

Every year my family and I do something kind for someone else. Some years it was small and some years it was huge!

For the past two years we have brought holiday cheer to the seniors at Bishop Broderick. Last year we raised 40 bags of groceries for the seniors and this year was amazing! God is good all of the time! With a simple Facebook post and a little bit of determination my mother and I found a Santa for 55 seniors at the Bishop Broderick!

But it gets even better… the more people I told about the event the more people wanted to help. Every item needed for their holiday party was donated!

I had people reaching out to me wanting to help. I felt so bad telling them that everything was taken care of! Their holiday party is today.
I can’t wait to go over and say Merry Christmas to all of them!

My wish this Christmas is to have kindness grow all year long!

And to Kelly, Thank you! I grew from your kindness!

Merry Christmas everyone, I hope you make wonderful memories and bring joy this Christmas!
Love Kathy


I’ve Got The Christmas “Feels”

How Do Christmas Decorations Make You Feel?

Every year my poor husband pulls out all of the bins filled with decorations for the holidays. Each year I look at them and feel both overwhelmed and excited all at the same time!

I have to admit, I do go overboard by having five different trees which are all 7 feet tall.
I always start out saying I’m not going to put everything out this year, but by the end of the week there’s not one piece of garland with lights left over.
It may take me a week to get everything decorated, but I love the presence of Christmas in my house! I love how our teenage boys still count down the days of Christmas from our Santa advent calendar.
Mostly, I love to just walk around the house and see all of the memories from our past Christmas…

I started to ask other people how Christmas decorations make them feel and I heard words like: HOME, PEACE, FAMILY, WARM, HUMBLED, KINDNESS, and LOVE!

Many of them said they love to go home and relax by their Christmas tree. My favorite response was from a client who said whenever she sees white Christmas lights she thinks of home! 

Hearing everyone tell me how the decorations makes them feel, made me think of what Christmas is really about!
It is a time to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ! It also made me think of how all of these words used to describe Christmas decorations also describe God…HOME, PEACE, FAMILY, WARM, HUMBLED, KINDNESS, and LOVE!
I know the holidays can be crazy busy and stressful! However, I hope everyone stops to enjoy the warm fuzzy feeling you get from holiday decorations because of what they mean to each of you…

Merry Christmas,
Love Kathy 

Holiday Repurposed Decor

Have you ever repurposed an artificial Christmas tree? If not, here is a way you can do it!

Boy, was I disappointed yet again this year when I took out our fairly new artificial Christmas trees and lights were broken!

I was all set to throw the trees away when I thought of using the branches as decor in my window boxes. Normally in years past I would buy fresh evergreens from a local farm, but at five windows the cost adds up…

I gathered my ideas and went to work! The top of the tree was made into a miniature tree placed in a ceramic pot outside. I then wrapped in some old snowy berry garland I had on hand from previous years. Most of the added accents used were all decorations I already had.

My favorite is the centerpiece I had kept from a previous floral arrangement. I placed it in the window box over my kitchen sink which allows us to enjoy it every day! I also tried something new this year called Christmas solar lights! They were used in the window boxes as well as the potted tree top. It’s great not having wires all over! 

The total cost of my project was:
(5) solar lights from Home Depot @ $19.99
(2)  garland from Wayfair @ $11.99
TOTAL COST $134.84

Everything else was re-purposed from previous Holidays! I hope you enjoy and can use this repurposed idea!
Happy Monday! Love, Kathy

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